(Source: plasticpiranhas)

(Source: ripndiplivefeed)


Take a look at this. That right there is the mail. Now, let’s talk about the mail. Can we talk about the mail, please, Mac? I’ve been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, okay. Pepe Silvia- this name keeps coming up over and over again. Everyday, Pepe’s mail keeps getting sent back to me. Pepe Silvia- Pepe Silvia. I look in the mail, this whole box is PEPE SILVIA! So I say to my…self, I’ve gotta find this guy. I’ve gotta go up to his office. I’ve gotta put the mail in his goddamn hands otherwise he’s never gonna get it. It’s gonna keep coming back down here. So, I go up to Pepe’s office and what do I find out Mac? What do I find out? There is no Pepe Silvia! The man does not exist, okay. So, I decide, ohh shit buddy, I’ve got to dig a little deeper. There’s no PEPE SILVIA! You’ve got to be kidding me, I’ve got boxes full of Pepe! Alright, so I start marching my way down to Carol in H.R. and I knock on her door and I say “CAROLL CARRROLLLLLL!! I’ve gotta talk to you about Pepe!” And when I open the door, what do I find? There’s not a single goddamn desk in that office. There is no Carol in H.R. Mac, half the employees in this building have been made up. This office is a goddamn ghost town.

Take a look at this. That right there is the mail. Now, let’s talk about the mail. Can we talk about the mail, please, Mac? I’ve been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, okay. Pepe Silvia- this name keeps coming up over and over again. Everyday, Pepe’s mail keeps getting sent back to me. Pepe Silvia- Pepe Silvia. I look in the mail, this whole box is PEPE SILVIA! So I say to myself, I’ve gotta find this guy. I’ve gotta go up to his office. I’ve gotta put the mail in his goddamn hands otherwise he’s never gonna get it. It’s gonna keep coming back down here. So, I go up to Pepe’s office and what do I find out Mac? What do I find out? There is no Pepe Silvia! The man does not exist, okay. So, I decide, ohh shit buddy, I’ve got to dig a little deeper. There’s no PEPE SILVIA! You’ve got to be kidding me, I’ve got boxes full of Pepe! Alright, so I start marching my way down to Carol in H.R. and I knock on her door and I say “CAROLL CARRROLLLLLL!! I’ve gotta talk to you about Pepe!” And when I open the door, what do I find? There’s not a single goddamn desk in that office. There is no Carol in H.R. Mac, half the employees in this building have been made up. This office is a goddamn ghost town.

(Source: ever-forward)

euo:

"I miss you. I miss not touching each other. Not seeing each other, not breathing in each other. I want you. All the time. No one else.

Blue is the Warmest Color (2013) dir. Abdellatif Kechiche

baradragon:

rick scott looks good here

baradragon:

rick scott looks good here

(Source: noidedmag)

(Source: brittkc)

(Source: thefilmfatale)

ruinedchildhood:

this episode changed me forever

(Source: abigalihobbs)

But I guess ultimately what scares me about marriage is where do you find this person? You know a lot of times, most successful relationships, people meet through work, school, mutual friends.

But what’s most interesting to me is when people just meet in life, just randomly.

You know, I have a friend, he got married, I asked him like “Hey, uh, where’d you meet your wife?” He was like “I was leaving Bed, Bath & Beyond. I was looking for my car - I drive a gray Prius. I saw a different gray Prius, I thought it was mine, I walked up to it, I realized I had the wrong car, but I bumped into Carol, we started talking, that was that”. That’s unbelievable.

Think about all the random factors that had to come together to make this one moment possible - this one moment that changed these two people’s entire lives:

First off, this guy has to live in this particular town. Then he has to get a gray Prius. Then he has to need to go to Bed, Bath & Beyond. Then he has to go to that particular Bed, Bath & Beyond. Then there has to be another guy who also lives in town, also drives a gray Prius, also needs to go to Bed, Bath & Beyond, also goes to that particular Bed, Bath & Beyond at around the same time. Then they have to both park somewhat near each other, my friend has to leave before the other guy leaves, see the wrong Prius, think it’s his, walk up to it. Then the woman, Carol, needs to be near the wrong gray Prius for a million other random reasons. They bump into each other, they start talking, their entire lives are changed.

That’s the most amazing and terrifying thing about life.

It is, cause the amazing thing is that at any moment, any one of us can have that moment that totally changes our lives. You could be leaving the show tonight, bump into someone… it could change your life. You don’t know, that could happen.

The terrifying thing is… what if we’re all supposed to be at Bed Bath & Beyond right now?

Aziz Ansari, Buried Alive (via mark-my-wordss)

grinderman2:

waiter: ready for the check?

customer: as a male feminist who loves eating pussy, yes that would be great

He’s the most amazing thing to ever happen to me and I constantly feel like I’m fucking it up by just being me

thewearysavantponders:

purple skeleton going the extra mile.

thewearysavantponders:

purple skeleton going the extra mile.

(Source: ragdollvera)

(Source: rhade-zapan)